A Tragic End

I've been contemplating not continuing this blog.  Originally when I had the idea, I thought I would write about all things homemaking and share my heart about things that really matter about our job as mother and wife.  While I am constantly writing these more thoughtful, heartfelt posts in my mind, they rarely, if ever, get typed out for you to read.  It seems that I have made this blog idea of mine into a way to show you what coupons I used and what I plan to feed my family with an occasional house keeping post.  There is a small part of me that never sits to write what I ponder because of the busyness of my life and keeping my family blog my first blogging priority.  There is a tiny part of me though that never puts these words out there for you because I feel inadequate at times to convey my heart the way that I want to.  The minute I hit "publish" I wish I had said things more eloquently or I'm concerned that I might be misunderstood and inadvertently give wrong impressions.

Last week my mom had an acquaintance who was notified that her young daughter in Atlanta was dying in the hospital.  Her daughter had had a minor cosmetic surgery, unbeknownst to her mother, and had contracted an infection from the surgery that was taking over her vital organs quickly.  Within a day or 2, this young girl died.  I found the obituary on line and saw her beautiful picture.  She was only 28 with a 2 year old daughter who will not have the privilege of being raised by her mom.  This story stuck hard in my mind.  I won't use words in this post that might be found through a google search, but this young, beautiful girl had a cosmetic surgery that is probably the most common of cosmetic surgeries among women today.  I'm sure if she had known the outcome of that "lifting and enlargening" surgery, she would have taken the "smaller" life to be a mom to her daughter, a daughter to her mom & dad, a sister and a friend to others.

I would probably say that 99.9% of women and girls are unhappy with one or more things about their body - I am no exception.  I've actually had some pretty strong issues with this area.  Last year I would have told you that I was a chronic dieter.  Last winter I went to a Bible study that changed my heart.  My friend began a ministry years ago called Finding Balance after her struggle with eating disorders.  She led the Bible study and we went through her materials that pinpointed the issues with food that we dealt with.  The unexpected thing was that all of the participants did not have eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia but just the same thing I struggled with....constantly wanting to change their weight and be that number on the scale or that size of jeans that was ingrained in their minds.  My friend has now launched a program called "More Than a Number (> #)."  Their conference will be in my area in just a week.  Check it out.

I tell you this not because I found freedom and now I love my body and lost those 20 lbs that I wanted to lose because neither of those things happened.  I tell you this because I am now fully aware of the traps that Satan has set before me (and all women) to desire skinny, beautiful and voluptuousness.  It's everywhere we look - advertisements, television, movies, magazines, social gatherings, schools, and even churches.

Had that beautiful, young mom known she was more than a number on a scale or a size of her undergarment and been able to be aware of Satan's lies and rebuke them, she'd be tucking her little girl in tonight.  I'm not judging any of you who have had cosmetic surgeries, so please don't mistake me.  I just want to encourage you as children of God to test your thoughts about outward beauty with God's word.  Weigh your motives as you try that new diet.  Are you on a quest for good health (which is Biblical) or in search of a model's body to shine in a tiny swimsuit?  Do you pursue righteousness with the passion that you count calories?  It's the heart that matters. 

If you struggle in this way, as I do, I encourage you to go to Finding Balance and sign up for their daily devotional.  It's very short but gives you something to chew on daily that can help you keep your focus on your inward beauty.

Forgive me for writing so much if you came to this blog to see what I got free at Walgreens this week.  BUT if you benefited from hearing my heart, let me know and I just might do it again.